Soon: Prologue: Idiots and Phones and the Mark of the Beast
Well, that’ll teach me to use the words “calendar” and “porn” in a post title. Someone found my blog by searching for “porn calendars.”
Hey, whatever works!
Jerry Jenkins does indeed get started on the phone porn right away–the paragraph I quoted a few days ago was the second in the book.
The first just introduces us to the fact that Delta Force Command Sergeant Andrew Pass drives a Chevy Electrolumina.
In case you are interested, his pursuers are in a Suburban Hydro.
Cars apparently powered by sun, electricity, and hydrogen? Like I said before, This World Rocks.
So, Andy tells Jack that he is being followed, that he is unarmed, and asks that he “get hold of Angela in case I can’t.”
Then, Andy hangs up. (Well, he touches his thumb and pinkie together, which is hanging up.)
This all raises some intersting questions:
1. What do people who use sign language do in this world? Seems like they would be constantly calling Australia.
2. Same question for people who work with their hands.
3. How can anyone ever be assured of privacy in this world? When the Marvelous Phone (praise its holy name) can be activated by tapping your fingers, can’t anyone’s life be put on speaker phone at any time?
4. And based on that question: WHY THE HELL DID ANDY HANG UP? Why doesn’t he want Jack and anyone who can hear him to know what happens? Seriously, WTF?
Boring scene short, Andy is caught. Good job, Command Sergeant.
A rawboned, thin-lipped woman with a shock of silver hair stepped forward. “Andrew Pass?”
He would not respond.
Oooo, Andy, you’re such a tough guy.
And remember folks, unattractive women are always evil.
Another uniform, a young man, patted him down. The vapor rushing from his mouth told Andy the kid was excited.
Yeah, only a young, fresh kid would be excited under such circumstances. Sure, Andy was just chased through the snow and captured by nefarious and vague evildoers, but it’s all pretty mundane.
“Unarmed.” He cuffed Andy’s hands behind his back, the steel cold on his wrists. “I’ll wand him.”
He ran a detector over Andy’s limbs, stopping when a high tone signalled the ID biochip beneath the skin of his right forearm. The young man studied an LED readout. “It’s Pass, all right.”
Wow, Andy really is dumb. If everyone has
the Mark of the Beast, just like in Left Behind ID biochips, then a) what’s with the tough guy, I’m-not-telling-you-my-name-and-you-can’t-make-me game? And b) why is he surprised when the bad guys scan his biochip? Wouldn’t the whole point of having biochips be so you could scan them?
The bad guys toss Andy into a truck and drive off.
Would his family or his compatriots have a clue what became of him?
Hmmm, I dunno. Sure would be cool if you had a phone implanted in your skull that you activated by tapping your fingers or just speaking, wouldn’t it?