Shadowed: Chapter 14: Hackers!
Another super-short chapter from Dan Brown-wannabe Jenkins.
Even in a chapter this short, though…I mean, I knew things were going to get even more jaw-droppingly horrible as we progressed, but I had still somehow forgetten about some of the little horrible things. Like, say, this gem:
Jae watched carefully as Brie rejoined the kids and sidled up to Connor. On one hand Jae worried how such news would hit him, but on the other she trusted Brie to share it better than she herself could.
She trusts her eight-year-old child to deliver news like this to the six-year-old.
IN A ROOM FULL OF OTHER CHILDREN BECAUSE IT IS STILL JESUS STORYTIME.
Jae is some kind of stone cold bitch, I’ll say that for her.
Mother of the Year, too.
Bizarrely, it’s actually not quite as bad as I first assumed…I mean, I thought Jae had tasked Brie to deliver the news of Uncle Berl’s death to little Connor. But no, Brie is instead just telling him about the whole on-the-run-from-the-gubmint. Connor takes it well, because this means they’re now “bad guys” and that is awesome.
But I still wonder…does Jae think Connor will remain six years old forever? Sooner or later, he is going to learn about Berlitz and all the other firstborn sons. And she’s already establishing that her eight-year-old daughter will be the bearer of news to her six-year-old son?
I just don’t even, at this point. The kindergardener needs to know they’re in hiding because of Jesus, but not that Jesus killed one of his most-loved people last night?
And yanno, I can’t even get over this—I already knew my mother was awesome beyond measure, but she also never made me break life-changing news to my little brother when I was eight and he was six.
Anyway, back to our new pal, Greenie! (He’s Irish, don’tcha know!)
Jack has tapped Greenie to be in charge while he (Jack) takes his little field trip to the surface world. Paul, who has been a part of this organization, let’s remember, for less than forty-eight hours, starts grilling Greenie like this is all some job interview:
“People respect you around here?”
“You want the responsibility, the head job?”
Is it just me, or does Paul seem just a leeeeetle bitter that Jack didn’t offer the position to him? I mean, surely Paul couldn’t take it, since I’m sure he has much more important things, no doubt of global importance, to do, but still…it’s always nice to be asked. To be respected.
Greenie is fine to take up the mantle of Supreme Dictator of the D.C. Underground, in and of itself, but a new problem has reared its ugly head:
“Okay, we’re seeing some evidence that someone might be hacking into our server.” [said Greenie]
“How can that be?” [asked Paul]
“I don’t know, and you wouldn’t either if I told you, would you?”
“I don’t suppose I would.”
Am I just tired, or does that exchange make no sense?
Paul heads out into the hall and makes a skull phone call to the one useful person in this story so far: Felicia.
SHE IS STILL AT WORK.
Her son is dead. Her SON is DEAD. And she is still at work.
Felicia was “about to call [Paul] anyway“…yanno, to inform him of the hacking and all. Apparently Paul completely sucks at being a double agent, because he hasn’t spotted any of the other agents all around the USSA, who are all doing a bang-up job themselves, since the various undergrounds are on the verge of being, “contaminated,” “compromised,” and “exposed.”
We haven’t mentioned this in quite some time, but Atheistopia just always does a great job at…well, everything.
Also, I amuse myself by imagining that Felicia is lying through her evil atheist teeth, and never had any intention of calling Paul, and was just waiting for the moment he would be captured and napalm-barreled for praying to his enforcer to kill her son.
But no. Sadly, my little fantasy only lasts until the next line of dialogue, when Felicia tells Paul that she is “pretty well committed to your side now” and “what I need is God.”
Another one bites the dust. Sad,