Monthly Archives: September 2018

TEoD: Chapter 58: Oy Gevalt

Even though there was no reason to split the party, and even though there was all the time in the world to investigate both the cavern at the site and the mysterious cars that showed up, Murphy and Levi kindly and intelligently headed off into the cavern themselves.  And Mossad agent Gideon, who has been cooling his heels for who-knows-how-long waiting for Murphy and Levi to arrive, heads off by himself to examine the multiple mysterious cars that have showed up at this dig site.

Gideon goes into this rather obvious trap feeling “a little apprehensive.”  He all but literally bumps into Talon, who is apparently coming out the back way from the underground temple-thingie with the goods in a gunny sack.

Since neither Murphy nor Levi gave Gideon a description of Talon, when the very pleasant-mannered man with the mustache is “friendly” with him, Gideon is only mildly suspicious.

“We’re exploring.  We found an entrance into a chamber in the ground.  It must have been hidden in the rocks for many years.  The other men are inside.  Come and see what we found.” [Talon offers Gideon]

Okay, is this or is this the dig-site version of saying to a little kid, “come and help me look for my lost puppy”?

Like a chump, Gideon leans in to see what’s in the sack (it’s the golden jar), and Talon bops him on the head with his walking stick (kinda lazy of Talon, I gotta say, but he was taken by surprise and is under some time pressure).  Then Talon smashes his hand so he can’t garb his gun.

Gideon knew he was in deep trouble.

Wow, he really is a Mossad agent!

This deep insight turns out to be Gideon’s last thought, because then Talon smashes his throat and kills him.

A few minutes later, Murphy and Levi make it out of the same exit Talon just used, and find Gideon’s body.

“Oy gevalt!”

Because he’s Jewish, you see.

Levi actually tears up (which is more than Murphy did for Paul), and “suddenly remembered that he would have to tell Gideon’s wife and two children that he would not be coming home.”

“Yeah, we left him chillin’ at the dig site for hours while we had breakfast out, then abandoned him to examine multiple strange cars and men while we went exploring.  Um, sorry or whatever.”

They assume that Talon will immediately try to jump the country, and Levi makes Murphy drive (!) while he calls in about Gideon.  They speed off to the airport and Murphy expresses some very Christian ideas about Talon:

“This time Talon is being pursued.  I hope he experiences the same fear the fox feels when the dogs are on his tail.  I would love to make him suffer in pain the way he makes others suffer.  He’s long overdue.”

Okay, first of all, I doubt Talon is quaking in his boots.  He might be utterly incompetent, but no more than you guys.  He’s evaded you this long.

Also, I get that Talon killed your wife and all, but isn’t vengeance something best left to God, Mr. Christian Hero?  Or at least, shouldn’t you be focused, as a good Christian, on getting Talon into the hands of the earthly authorities, instead of making him “suffer in pain“?  I don’t remember any specific spot in the Bible where Jesus urges his followers to make their enemies “suffer in pain.”  Just sayin’.

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TEoD: Chapter 57: What’s Behind Wall #1

So, the big cliffhanger reveal isn’t nearly exciting as we might have been led to believe.

The guys enter a big room (“It seemed much larger than” the previous room–thanks, Mr. Archaeologist who maps out dig sites.)  The room contains maybe benches and an altar and four dead bodies are scattered around.  I’m kinda surprised, but Levi and Murphy actually check the men to make sure they’re dead, then Murphy declares them not dead, but “priests or worshippers of Dagon.”  (Really, Mr. Archaeologist, you don’t know for sure?)  Murphy then looks at the altar, and seriously sees clean splotches in the dust where the jar of manna and Aaron’s rod just were.  But whoever killed the men (spoiler: it’s Talon) just took them.  Just a moment ago.

Thus demonstrating the inherent problems with Methuselah scouting these locations ahead of time, making a hole to get in, then just leaving and waiting for Murphy to get off his ass and find it again.  Thus leaving Murphy “excited and exasperated.”

And just think, Murphy, if you had only spent less time jogging with Summer and more time doing archaeology, you’d have the artifacts in your hand now.

But Murphy is so lacking in self-awareness that he instead snaps at Levi, who proposes that they “go after whoever killed them.”

“‘Whoever’!  You know as well as I do that it’s got to be Talon.  We’re not far behind him.  I wonder how he found out about the Golden Jar and Aaron’s Rod?”

I just love that Murphy is not concerned at all about catching Talon because he just killed four other human beings, but just because he has the stuff that Murphy couldn’t be arsed to go and get for months.

So they sensitively step over the bodies and out into the corridor…where they encounter a live body.

Now, encountering a guy who has been shot, I figure many of us would try to help.  But not our Christian hero!  Murphy leans over (no touching!) and demands of the MAN WHO HAS BEEN SHOT:

“Do you speak English?  Do you understand me?”

The man only groaned.

Gee, go figure.

“Do you know who did this to you?”

Do you want to DO anything about this, asshat?

The dying man actually manages to make two letters in the dust before carking it.

Murphy shook his head gravely.  It was never pleasant to see anyone die.

So sensitive!

It’s a very blasé attitude coming from a man who saw his murdered wife die in front of him two years ago.  Eh, it’s not the most pleasant thing ever.

The letters are T U.

And Murphy is kinda annoyed because TU doesn’t start Talon.  So I suppose maybe this guy doesn’t actually speak and write English, you ass.

I’d actually like to think that the T got messed up a bit and is a messy F, and the guy wanted his last expression on Earth to be “Eff you, Murphy!”

Levi immediately searches the newly-dead guy and finds his wallet, which contains ID and some cash and, hilariously, a picture.  But not of the guy’s kids, but of his terrorist cell.  It’s Talon and all the other dead guys, and they’re all standing at the back of a car and you can see the license plate.

Yeah, I really don’t see why you would commemorate your terrorist group and carry around a picture of you all in your wallet.  Just to help the police or military or stupid archaeologist i case you’re ever captured or killed?

Also, doesn’t the put a damper on Murphy’s theory that these guys were priests or Dagon groupies?

So Murphy and Levi decide to head back upside so Levi can actually make a call for reinforcements.  Also, they’ve left their friend up there alone, and Talon is around, so there’s that, too.