Soon: Musings on Themes, the Cover, and the First Few Pages

Where to begin, where to begin?

I had it easy with Babylon Rising.  It was, in its way, recognizably bad, in the way that readers of Slacktivist, Apocalypsereview, and Mouse’s Musings know all too well–unlikeable heroes, bad theology, and a rather warped perspective on such subjects as love, family, friendship, and being a good person.  They take place in a vague “not too distant future,” though still very much our world.

Not so with Soon.  Jerry Jenkins actually did some world-building here, and built himself a world set precisely in 2036 (more on the dates later).  A world in which religion has been outlawed.  It’ll be slow going over the first chapter or two, as I will attempt to address what Jerry Jenkins thinks such a world would be like.

But oh, that is only the beginning of the insanity.  So, things may jump around a bit for the first few posts of Soon-critique, as I get my feet wet.  I was first introduced to Soon via book-on-CD on a long car trip, and I must have been a sight to fellow drivers, my face taking on the following expressions at regular intervals:

Hey, at least it made the trip go by quickly.

I noticed these themes along the way.  Keep your eyes open–good for drinking games, too!

1.  This World Rocks: Okay, before anyone gets any ideas, no, I am not saying it is a good idea to outlaw religion.  In fact, I feel quite the opposite.  Yet Jenkins cannot seem to help portraying this atheist-run world as fun and interesting, not to mention replete with great scientific and technical achievement.  It’s very, very odd.

2.  If You’re “Nice,” You’re a Christian: Has a new character introduced him/herself?  Does he/she seem abnormally friendly and open-hearted?  Why, you’ve probably met an Underground Zealot!  (Please note: my definition of “nice” and Jenkins’ definition tend to vary on certain particulars.  In at least one case, the Kind and Noble Christian simply strikes me as Pushy (really pushy) and Self-Absorbed.  Readers of the other RTC-literature blogs I have mentioned may recognize this phenomenon.)

3.  It’s Not Okay When Atheists Do It: Actions and attitudes of people and organizations that would be considered perfectly fine coming from Christians are decidedly Not Okay and Also Evil when coming from atheists.

4.  But It’s Okay When Atheists Get It: As with the Left Behind books, the pain and suffering (not to mention the TORTURING FOREVER) of atheists will be dismissed with the smallest of shrugs, while the paper cuts of believers are matters of life and death.

5.  The Acronyms, Oh, the Acronyms: Jerry Jenkins loves his anagrams. 

I use a lot of anagrams in my books.  Paul Stepola’s last name is an anagram, as are others in the Soon series.  I do that for my own amusement, but it’s fun when readers notice.  Sometimes I’ll give hints, but I never come out and tell them.

 -Jerry Jenkins, Writing for the Soul, p. 104

While listening to the CDs for the first time, I was unaware that “Stepola” is an anagram for “Apostle.”  So our hero’s name is Paul Apostle.  Subtle.

But now that I have the book, it is obvious that Jerry Jenkins has vastly underestimated my ability to access anagram sites on the heathen intertubes.

I really can’t stand anagrams.

And last, but most certainly not least:

6.  Paul Stepola Is a Horrible, Horrible Man: Given that Paul Apostle is a Jenkins hero, this almost goes without saying.  After all, this is the man who brought us Rayford Steele and Lionel Washington.  His longtime writing partner is the man who brought us Josh Jordan, love-bombing Abigail Jordan, and, of course, Michael Murphy. 

Paul Apostle may top them all for sheer asshattery.  Seriously, there is no portion of this man’s life in which he is not a complete tool.  Lousy husband, lousy father, lousy coworker, lousy friend.  And he only gets worse after his conversion.

Oops.  Hope I didn’t spoil anything there.  😉

Okay, okay, enough putting this off by talking about the big picture.  Let’s crack open Soon!

Ooo, wait, let’s check out the cover first.

The front cover has an ominous-looking city skyline, the big silver letters of SOON rushing towards us.  Soon: The Beginning of the End.  I actually kinda like the cover design.  It’s nothing we all haven’t seen many times before, but that doesn’t mean it’s not effective.

The back cover, though, is where things get decidedly wacky.  Picture of a smirking Jerry Jenkins, below this odd introduction to the story:

Before millions were left behind, they couldn’t see it coming…SOON.

If you say so, I guess.  What an oddly-structured sentence–just try saying it aloud.

Okay, now it’s time to open the book.

The first page quotes John Lennon: Imagine…no religion too.  Yeah, that’s cute and all, and I’m sure that Jenkins has no love for this great song, imagining as it does an eeevil socialist utopia.  No possessions, nothing to kill for…and no religion.  Somehow, though, I can’t work up too much sorry for Jenkins, given the number of RTCs in recent history who have either left that part out of the song or, worse, changed the lyrics to “and one religion, too.”

The next page has small sections of letters to Time magazine from 2002.  In response to an article in Time about the three Abrahamic religions, two people, one from Finland, one from England, opined that the world would be a better and more peaceful place without religion.  You can read the letters here, if you would like.

Okay, I am all for getting ideas for stories from interesting places, from a snippet of a letter, a few chance words in a conversation.  So far, so good.  But Jenkins sure has a task ahead of him if he hopes to convince me that a world in which religion is banned is right around the corner, given the number of people currently in this world who think that nonreligious people deserve not just to be silenced, but to be tortured forever.

Plank, eye, Jerry.  Just sayin’.

Next time: an introduction to the history of this future world, Legos, and PHONE PORN.

In the meantime, enjoy the genius of John Lennon: